Recently Miruspeg wrote an inspirational blogpost about Choosing Happiness. I agree with all she said - and yet I am finding it hard to put into practice.
Here's what happened today. While looking for a favourite pair of earrings I chanced upon a ring that I thought I'd lost! (That's it, in the pic above.) And before you ask, no it's not a diamond. Its value is sentimental more than anything else. It was my mother-in-law's and she left it to me in her will. I thought it had been lost during the February earthquake when everything got flung around. I had searched high and low for it – had given up. But today, hey presto, there it was safely tucked away in a special box with other treasures. I was thrilled and overjoyed!!!
So that's the happy. Now the sad. I cannot find my earrings (the ones I was originally looking for) anywhere. I've run out of places to look. And these were my favourites – beautiful clear quartz in a square cut. So many things have moved around since February. I've moved house, had builders and decorators in - oh yeah, and I've been away for nearly 3 months. I am gutted.
Now, do I focus on the happy or the sad? I choose happy. I am really pleased to have found that ring – it is irreplaceable – though my feelings still hurt for the loss of the earrings. And I think we do need to honour our feelings. Choices are made in our minds, but while we are here on the material plane, things hurt. Our feelings cannot always be controlled by that rational little voice in our head. All the same, I do know I can probably replace the earrings. But I don't think I will. I'll just let it go. There is always the small hope that maybe they will turn up just as that ring did. In a few months time I'll have a lovely surprise!
My intuition tells me that through this juxtaposition of events, I am being taught a lesson. Nothing is coincidence. That's why I thought I'd share it with you.
12 comments:
Juxtaposition!!! I have learnt a new word. :D)
It is very sad when we lose a favourite item and maybe the earrings will turn up one day but that is not the point of this post is it.
It took me a long time to learn that my most prized posssessions are quite meaningless in scheme of things. I can still treasure them but if they break or get lost it is not earth-shattering.
I am happy that your choose happy Stoneweaver because if you are being taught a lesson your beloved earrings will most likely come out of hiding when you least expect them to.
Also thanks for the plug for my post....very kind of you.
Namaste and love and light
Peggy xxxxx
lovely... and yes I too choose happiness, but I too understand that nothing is a permanent state of mind, and only when I try to hold onto it to do I hurt. x
Coincidence or Meant to Happen. I don't believe in Meant to Happen. Doesn't that take away my ability to make my "own" future..choices..path?
We misplace things all the time. It doesn't mean they are gone for good and usually turn up somewhere when we least expect it.
Choose happiness for sure.
I hope things are getting back to normal for you. I suspect the loss of the earrings is not causing the sadness you might feel.
Glad you found your ring :)
Your earrings may still show up.
We gutted and painted our basement, replaced carpet and everything.
Cody had left some computer screws or something tiny that he wanted to keep, laying around pre-gutting.
I am sure we vacuumed several times and the place was completely empty as we painted. Nevertheless, his lost items showed up in the basement months later after it was refinished.
It was totally weird. There is no reason we can think of that the screws should have still been there at all.
You never know...
Peggy and Robyn: Yes - it is about letting go. But if they do turn up - it will be a bonus! :o)
Carol: Things have been pretty abnormal for me for quite a while that's for sure!! What a year! Three earthquakes and a whole lot of family emergencies. The loss of the earrings is the least of my worries. And though I agree with you about 'meant to happen' I do think that when things happen next to each other there is a chance to find a deeper meaning. Losing the earrings and finding the ring on the same day is significant (for me). Reminding me to rejoice in the good things and let go of small inconveniences.
H.O. How weird. I know the feeling of having searched a place entirely and have something turn up. Years ago I lost my wedding ring (yeah - major eeeeeek!) and I methodically removed every single item from my jewellery box. It wasn't in there. I gave up. Was utterly morose (and apologetic to hubby - can you imagine!?) Then 2 weeks later, got back from holiday, opened my jewellery box and there was the ring. Weirdness. But a happy ending! :o)
Such a great post with a message that we all should take to heart. I am glad that you found the ring. I suppose when you stop looking for something...it finds you when the time is right. Be well!
hello,
i hope you find your earrings. still, so lovely that your 'lost' ring is back. maybe kiwi fairies are playing tricks on you. your life does sound like there have been big challenges! choosing happy is wonderful when we can pull it off! thank you for the inspiration.
Good on ya I often choose happiness and I often fail. I think your earrings will show up as well eventually. Because of everything things are just a little bit out of order. I think to be succesful in chooosing happiness we have to learn to living in the moment That means not being attached to anything. Like enjoying what comes to you now and than let it go again. You can't hold on it for ever as nothing is forever.
Am so glad that ring showed up! I remember you were really upset when you lost it and am sure M is also pleased! I agree with all the comments about getting attached to material things. Although, I excuse myself by telling myself that the things I get attached to are items I associate with people. (I am ballderdashing myself of course).
I have had a run of losing things recently. I've just lost a broach that was my nan's and a ring that my ex partner gave me and I've had for about ten years. So I was/am really annoyed. I lost a scarf too, which is annoying but I can live with that. I also lost and found my hairbrush so yay!
I remember reading the Bone People and the main character has sort of invested a lot of personal bejewelled/jade items with almost talismanic powers, she is so attached to them and I disliked her for it... and then I go and get all attached to silver shiny things! Big fat hypocrite is me!
So thank you for the post because it reminds me that being attached to material things can tie me down. Although I won't berate myself too much for it as I didn't morph into Gollum! (And I think it's fairly normal - not everyone can denounce material possessions and become a wandering swami!).
But then I wonder if this is also quite a lot of what this is about: being mindful. So being present like Marja says but also what Peg says, because to choose first you have to be mindful about what is going on and how you feel.
Being happy or sad are emotions, which are completely different to a rational decision such as deciding to focus on the positive (and focusing on the positive isn't exactly the same thing as deciding to be happy - though it's a way of getting there).
One can choose to focus on the positive but no one is saying that one will never be sad. Or that it's some kind of weakness to be sad occasionally or that life won't throw one a curve ball. So as well as mindfulness I think it's also about giving oneself a break. It's also human and healthy to be sad sometimes on some occasions!
You're one of the most caring and compassionate people I know, and I KNOW that if anyone came to you and said they were feeling sad you would listen to them and give them a big hug (and maybe some Reiki) so I think a good idea might be to be your own best friend and treat yourself with the same kindness that you treat other people.
You have been through such a lot lately (I agree with Carol that maybe it's not just about the ring/necklace). It sounds like you need a bit of space to think and a lot of hugs from yourself as well as your lovely hubby and gorgeous fluffy purry companions! And maybe the earrings will show up or maybe they won't but maybe you'll find/be given some earrings that you love even more!
And thank you again because I'm going to - for once - take my own advice and give myself some space and try and be a bit more mindful and present.
Miss you lovely. Sending you a humungous hug!!
XXXXXXXXXXXX
Caroline - yeah, good thought. They will find me!
Tammie - Funny you should say that. Been definitely picking up some fairy energy in my new home. Oh the little scamps!
Marja - Very true. And on the big scale we must look forward to the new Christchurch that is being built!
(((((Katie)))))) I needed to hear that today. Thank you gorgeous! x
To experience happiness we have to know sadness, the same applies to all opposites. If we only knew happiness there would be a tendency for complacency. After sadness or any other kind of suffering,I always live with newness and a deeper understanding of what's happened. If it's been something really challenging, then after I feel stronger and realise my courage.
Re the earrings, in recent times I have mislaid one earring out of the 2. My favourite amber is down the back of my dressing table and one day I'll come up with a contraption involving a magnet and try and retrieve. One I lost in a carpark getting out of the car this January, but immdiately let go and focussed on the friends I was about to see. When I left remembered the earring turned the head lamps on and reversed and there it was glistening.
A friend of mine shared with me she lost the same earring about 12 times, it just kept coming back.
Definitely about detaching, easier said than done though.
We are all jewels and treasure towers of this life, so let's shine with brilliance
Renee xxx
Thanks for the insights Renee. Yes - the choice is about where you focus. Bad things happen to a greater or lesser degree all the time, but we can choose to focus on what matters most. As you say, our friends are worth focusing on.
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